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Extra Nutty! Even More Letters from a Nut!, by Ted Nancy
Ebook Download Extra Nutty! Even More Letters from a Nut!, by Ted Nancy
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Welcome to the world of Ted L. Nancy. Some have called him inspired, some have called him a goofball, and many have wondered who Ted really is. All we know is that Ted loves to write and it shows-Extra Nutty! is chock full of nut, a record of real live correspondence from America's favorite pen pal to a cross-section of this great nation. Extra Nutty! is bursting with all new letters showing Ted at his looniest.
Take, for example, this:
Dear Business Permits Dept.: I want to apply for a business permit in your fine city...I operate the Soup & Sleep Restaurants. You can either order soup or sleep. A hostess will greet you and you would say, "I'd like to sleep." She will lead you to a table where you can catch a few winks.
Or this:
Dear Helena Ocean & Dog Licensing Dept: I will stage the play "Mark Twain with Tourette's Syndrome.". . . Let me know what arrangements I need to make to store my anchovie tank at your seaport. Thank you. I await large crowds.
Or even this:
Dear Kmart: I have invented a male underpants liner...This liner fits right in your shorts and can be thrown away after 15 weeks. I have been wearing the same pair of underwear for 105 days now and although they feel a little stretchy they are perfectly clean.
Ted's unique way of looking at the world-and how the world responds to Ted's schemes--is captured here in this extra nutty, hugely hilarious collection.
- Sales Rank: #944173 in Books
- Brand: St. Martin's Press
- Published on: 2000-06-14
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 10.86" h x .95" w x 5.58" l, 1.07 pounds
- Binding: Hardcover
- 224 pages
- Great product!
From the Back Cover
Ms. Barbara Ramey
RALPHS SUPERMARKETS
PO Box 54143
Los Angeles, CA 90054
Dear MS. Ramey:
Thank you very much for answering my letter concerning the haunted sponge I bought from a Ralphs store. Ralphs has been and always will be the only store I shop in for my food and sponge needs.
In your letter to me you said that I would be hearing from the supplier of this songe. I have not heard from them. And this sponge is bad.
Can someone from Ralphs come and get this sponge from me? This sponge is out to get me. I am afraid.
After I got your letter I went down to my basement and locked that sponge in a steel box and put a chain around that box. Then I wrapped that box in tape and put a shackle around that. Then I boarded up the basement door with over 1000 nails. Then I put a manacle on that door. Then I went upstairs to my room to get a good nights sleep.
At about 3 o'clock in the morning I woke up and looked down. That sponge was right by my bed. I am scared. Please help me.
Also, do you sell Brillo at your store?
When will I hear from the supplier? I need to know. Thank you for your reply.
Sincerely,
Ted L. Nancy
About the Author
Ted L. Nancy is a pseudonym used by Barry Marder. Marder is a comedian, former writer on "Seinfeld" and the co-writer of Dreamworks' animated hit "Bee Movie." He has written for Bill Maher, Jay Leno, & David Letterman.
He also wrote with George Carlin. He is an enthusiastic and busy citizen who lives in Glendale, CA. (He moved there for the paranormal experiences.) He enjoys poppyseeds.
Most helpful customer reviews
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Ted Does it Again
By Dawn Gordon-Luks
Ted L. Nancy, has done it again. I didn't think it was possible to come remotely close to the side splitting humor in the first two books, but he managed to do it for a third time.
"Extra Nutty" had me in tears (from laughing) right from the start. As usual, I don't want to finish the book immediately, so I'm only reading a few pages a day.
Ted, or Jerry (who I honestly believe is the "real" author) please, please do a "Nut" book every year!
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Funniest thing i have ever read
By R. Cannata
I bought all books in this series within a few weeks after discovering them. Hands down the funniest stuff I have ever read.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Toilet Side Reading
By A Customer
Ted L. Nancy writes strange letters to random companies in order to get odd responces. He gives a book load of hilarious but short conflicts to laugh about. Nancy pokes and picks at these random executives to exploit them for the laughs of the general public.
Nancy is a comedian who just wants to annoy these companies. He assumes the role of a circus clown, a man who plays a big baby, even a man interested in injecting ham into his blood stream. These are real companies. Of the group: Ruth Chris, Oscar Meyers, the Louisiana Superdome, even Olsmobile were all mailed by the mystery man. The book caused side splitting laughter to anyone who dares to crack the binding. short pages, fun to read, great for school. Overall I'd say Nancyis a hilarious man that makes it easy for the reader toget a laugh. I feel that it could even encourage some kids to do the same.
I would recommend this book to anyone who likes to listen to comedians like Jeff Foxworthy. Actually I would recommend this book to anyone who wants to laugh. This is a fun, light, read, My english teacher says, "It would be a good book to read while going to the bathroom."
Scott, CT
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